

Pellegrina
Christopher DeMorteau
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On April Fools’ Day, 1997, Alex Trebek hosted Wheel of Fortune, while Pat Sajak and Vanna White—the show’s official presenters—took their turn as players.
After seventeen minutes of suspense, Vanna White sighed in relief.
- “It’s not as easy as it looks!”
Trebek applauded with professional enthusiasm.
- “It’s not as easy as it looks! That’s the phrase! Way to go!”
The crowd responded with warm approval. Twenty-five thousand dollars for the American Cancer Society and the Boy Scouts of America. And now, with the bonus round, Pat and Vanna had the chance to double that amount.
- “…And the bonus round, coming up… right after this!” His index finger pointed toward the camera as the screen faded to commercials.
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Chocolate
Lipstick
A new red sports car
Vitamins. Boxers trust’em. Why won’t you?
A mattress. You simply can’t get up!
Credit card
Liposuction. Feel younger, be younger.
Breaking News Follow-up: “Death toll from mass suicide rises to thirty-nine, after Heaven’s Gate religious cult leader Marshall Applewhite promised his followers’ souls would ascend to the Hale–Bopp comet’s mothership and be given new bodies”.
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Colors and letters swirled across the screen, and Trebek’s face appeared, eyebrows raised in a grin, tie gleaming under the lights.
“Vanna and Pat are standing here for the bonus round. Now, let’s see. What you’re looking for in this round is a movie—the title of a blockbuster…”
Everyone knew charity specials had easy questions—scandalously easy, even. But this one was different. This was no summer breeze under a mighty tree for the American Cancer Society and the Boy Scouts of America. Trebek’s voice carried a note of gravity that stilled the audience.
“…It’s a film title with five letters. Winner in three categories at last year’s MTV Movie Awards. The only film where Morgan Freeman, Brad Pitt, Gwyneth Paltrow, and Kevin Spacey co-star. A film noir steeped in darkness, brutality, and mystery; two detectives hunting a deranged serial killer whose crimes are inspired by the seven deadly sins. Five letters—and let’s see which consonant appears on the board…”
A few seconds of trepidation.
“…Okay! It’s a ‘G’ in the middle. The middle letter of our five-letter film noir is a ‘G’…”